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Love and marriage are the greatest adventures in life, and they point they way to our relationship with the Almighty.

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Thursday, October 5, 2017

Your Dying Spouse 373 - A Caregiver's Trust {#write31days}

As a caregiver, you've got to trust the patient...and that can be hard.

  • You have to trust the patient to be honest...how much pain are you in? How bad is it? Many patients...myself included...tend to minimize symptoms, which makes the eventual collapse less predictable and thereby harder to deal with. others exaggerate pain and emotional trauma, which deploys a caregiver' energies unnecessarily. And some just don't know how they feel.
  • You have to trust the patient to be sensible, like not having a large frosty delicious Coke on a hot summer's day when diabetes is a problem. (Hey, don't look at me, I drink diet, and don't have diabetes). Sensible also includes not pushing too hard (guilt hand raised, here) and keeping up morale by not watching sad movies or listening to mournful songs (like Memory from Andrew Lloyd Weber's Cats.)
  • You have to trust your patient/spouse with as much responsibility as he or she can handle, because responsibility is the touchstone for an equally-shared life.
And you have to trust someone else...God. You have to trust that he will give you the strength to go on when you're too tired to move, and you have to empty a bedpan...again.

You have to trust Him to answer back with patience when your mate has asked you the same question three times in the last ten minutes.

And you have to trust Him to give you the patience to get through the moments when you just want to scream and break things, because you've been pushed to the limit. (And He gets it...remember, he chased people around with a whip,and overturned their selling-tables!)

How about Julie Andrews, singing I Have Confidence, for a musical theme?

Write 31 Days prompts - 2017

I do ask that you be patient with my slow replies to your comments (which we treasure). I'm trying to stay caught up.

Still hoping to get the new and improved version of Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart up and running in the near future. Just haven't had the energy to do it yet...but if you would like to read it, please say so in your comment and I'd be glad to send you a PDF (which should fit your Kindle).

I have another blog, "Starting The Day With Grace". The focus is a grace quote from someone you might not expect (like, say Mick Jagger) and a short commentary. I hope you'll join me.

Marley update... been moved to a sanctuary, and Bay County will revise their 'dangerous dog' codes.


And marley has a Facebook page! Please drop by to see how happy he is today.

If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.

Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.


  1. Good words here. Thanks. And it's a good reminder to me to be honest with how I am really doing, and to be sensible and not push myself harder than I should.

    Love the song! The Sound of Music is my favorite movie! Back in my healthier days I played Maria in our small town production of The Sound of Music. I'll always be grateful that I pushed myself hard back when I still could. I'm grateful for good memories like that.

    1. Rachel, it is hard not to push, isn't it? Just today I did go to far, fell and bashed my head on a rock. Barb was not pleased.

      How wonderful that you played MAria! I'm so glad you had that opportunity.

      You're in our daily prayers.

  2. Hi Andrew ... this is a tremendous series. I know it's going to impact many people in ways you probably can't predict.

    I'm excited to feature it on my blog this week, too!

    Blessings ...

    1. Linda, thank you so much! It is a challenging series, but so far, I'm keeping up.

      And I'm so honoured that you featured it! Thanks you!

  3. It's hard to trust. But when we do and trust is a two way street, there is great reward!

    1. Tara, you're absolutely right. It has to be a two-way street.

      Thanks so much for being here!