Loving Monday Morning

For a lot of couples, the transition from a nice weekend to the workweek to come can be fraught with peril.

It's all too easy to lose the good feelings and memories of the weekend, last thing Sunday night. Think of a weekend's memories as a vase; you can take it into work with you, and look at it when the office politicos are rampaging through the cubicles, empire-building away with grimly gay abandon.

Or, if you drop and shatter that lovingly crafted vase, you'll walk through the office door looking like the Taliban's latest recruiting poster. At least the political animals will leave you alone, 'cause their hats would;d look stupid sitting directly on their shoulders.

It's so easy to drop the vase. One careless word, one nudge from the evil eye of the television, and the joy-lights will flicker. The word becomes a sentence, and a harangue, and the joy-light gutters out, leaving only wisps of smoke to remind you of what was. (Vases and lights, and didn't I have a blast, mixing metaphors!)

Keeping the magic alive is easier than you think. It takes choices, and it takes discipline. Just two major parameters!

But beyond those, here are some further, practical applications of what you can do -

• Don't watch the local or national news late on Sunday night. Newscasting is entertainment, pure and simple, and broadcasters count their programs as being effective if they can instill either disgust or outrage. They give you an itch, so you'll want to watch more, scratching it. Fine for their ratings, but at best divisive for you as a couple. Sunday evening should be a time to be together, but the news is designed to compartmentalize you, keep you in a 'locked room' with the newscaster. So...why not turn off the TV after the end of Downton Abbey? Just set the rest of the evening as quiet time. (If you need to know the weather - a prime excuse for watching the local news - get it off the Internet during the day.)
• No controversial subjects, either for you personally (like family finances, or when are the remodelers going to put the roof back on the living room?), or generally (like, say, North Korea). If you need to get some personal stuff done over the weekend, pick a time during the day. Not last thing Sunday.
• This will sound odd - but no sex. Make Saturday 'date night', and set aside Sunday as a night of closeness and intimacy, but no intercourse. The reason is that we all tend to start mentally planning for the week, and not being 'there' for your mate can be demoralizing. It's a very grounded need, to be appreciated on that level, and competing with Monday's eight-o'clock meeting can lead to tears, or worse. Accept that, and develop physical closeness that will bring you together - but will also allow for the inevitable independent thinking, without hurt feelings.

Going out the door on Monday with a warm glow from a nice 48 hours can set the tone for the day, the week, and sometimes your whole career.

It can help you recognize opportunity, mend rifts, and overcome obstacles. Riding the crest of a wave of joy will bring sunshine into the workplace.

Care to give it a try?