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Monday, October 8, 2018

Your Dying Spouse 525 - Falling Into Pride

Pride's an easy trap into which to fall.

Particularly so, when you're facing something really horrendous like cancer...and you know, or at least think that you're doing it pretty well.

The level of pain, as I write this, is so bad that I'm literally trembling. I would much rather stop, and do something else...or to be more accurate,not do anything.

And then there's nausea, and its side effect that I won't describe.

But I'm still writing, and still taking care of the dogs, and still giving Barbara every bit of support I can so that she can advance professionally, and build a life that will sustain her when I'm dead.

Very few people could do this, face this, and still maintain both a cheerful disposition, and an attitude of uncompromising faith.

That's what I think sometimes. Part of it is perhaps true; I'm no stranger to pain, both that inflicted by others and by accident. And I know how to drive myself very hard indeed - "The more you sweat in training, the less you bleed in battle."

But it's easy to place myself in some lofty place, to look around and say, "You...and you...and you...y'all could never to this. I can, because I'm tougher and stronger and more resilient."

Did you just hear the trap spring shut?

Because I'm better.

But the truth is, I don't know how anyone else might face this. I'm not them.

I'm just me, and I have no right to judge.

I just have the obligation to do my best, and the only comparison I'm allowed is with myself.

Music from Buffalo Springfield, ith For What It's Worth.



Please pardon my slow response to comments. I do my best, and your comments are really precious to me. Barb is answering many of them now. I'm running on fumes, if you don't mind a macho metaphor.

I'm grateful for the energy to have written this. I'm so glad Barbara's stepped in for many of my posts. I'm really not doing well at all.

Thanks to Carol Ashby, Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart is back on Kindle, and will be available in paperback soon.

Friends are everything. I couldn't have done it.

Marley, the canine waif from Afghanistan, whom WE helped save, has a Facebook page! Please drop by to see how happy he is today.



If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.

Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.







16 comments:

  1. ... and I'm pretty sure Jesus is okay with you feeling proud of doing a job well done. You had a special assignment, and he knew what he was doing. (The enemy just likes to twists and contort thoughts, feelings, even pride, and basically ANYTHING - and any way - to get our eyes off the prize on onto ourselves. Lucky for you, his sniveling ways are soon over.) Sleep well, friend.

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    1. Jane, thank you SO MUCH for this!

      And please know you are in our hearts and prayers.

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  2. (((Andrew)))
    Another morning.
    Annie in Texas

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    1. (((((Annie!)))))

      Another morning it is, and it's a lovely one. This is the day the Lord has made...

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  3. I'm guessing there's a healthy kind of pride, a sense of satisfaction in a job well done, a task completed, knowing you've done your best with what you had with God's help.

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    1. Linda, I think that's true, that there is a healthy pride. Thank you for this!

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  4. Wow, love this Andrew. Sending love and blessings to you, Barb and the animals.

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    1. Leon, thank you so much! Love and blessings back, from all of us.

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  5. Humility doesn't mean thinking you're no good. It means knowing your place. In my opinion you're a humble hero. So let your courage continue to shine.

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  6. Andrew, I had this (I'm sure) profound comment that Blogger erased. Sigh. I so appreciate your candor here. There are times I've faced situations when pride has niggled in and convinced me I was living out a certain situation better than others. God is so patient and gracious to put me in my place when I need it. When we remember that He enables each of us to walk our unique journeys in the individual ways He designed us to walk them, it becomes easier to walk a little more humbly.

    And for the record, I agree with Janet above.

    Sending you continuing prayers and hugs, my friend.

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    1. Jeanne, you're so right...God's grace and patience are really the only things that can get us through!

      I'm so grateful for your comment, and honoured.

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  7. Those moments of pride are sin. Let no one assuage you otherwise. But, you're in good company here on earth (me). And you showed humility in admitting your sin to us all. You're a strong man.

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    1. Emily, thank you for this. You're absolutely right; pride's a sin, and it's one we won't be entirely free of until we see God face to face.

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  8. I'm with Jane... There is a difference between pride and being proud of yourself for how well you're doing. One takes the credit from God and others, I've never seen you NOT give Jesus credit...

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    1. Misty, thank you so much for this lovely, gracious affirmation! You made my day.

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