"I guess my special corner is our 'corner' of a New Mexico mesa; we have a sanctuary for unwanted an abused ogs, and even though it's getting mighty hard for me to walk and do other things, I'm still charged with their care, and we go out slowly, under the high and grace-filled sky, day and night, together.
"It's a two-way street, for they return my love with gentleness and compassion. My bed is an ottoman pushed up against a sofa in the kennel area, and they cuddle against me to keep me warm when the chills come, and watch DVDs with me.
"I'm grateful for the pancreatic cancer and lymphoma that measure my days, because how else would I have realized that I am living in a small (and sometimes noisy!) corner of Heaven, right here, right now?
"Grace abounds, and I am grateful that my eyes have been opened to see it, and live it."
There's the eternal question...don't you wish it were different?
Along with do you want to be healed?
Sure, it would be nice to be healed, God knows that. I don't bug him.
But as to wishing it were different, well, no. This road has opened my eyes and my heart. I would not give up this perspective; dying is teaching me how to live.
And this blog has gotten around a quarter of a million hits; it's reached some people, somewhere, and it's a kind of ministry.
Would I wish that away, it return for my old life, for my old self?
No, I wouldn't.
I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.
Which brings us to a clip from the excellent film Blood Diamond, which I hope you'll watch...and I hope you'll be inspired to watch the whole film.
Please pardon my slow response to comments. I do my best, and your comments are really precious to me. Barb is answering many of them now. I'm running on fumes, if you don't mind a macho metaphor.
I'm grateful for the energy to have written this. I'm so glad Barbara's stepped in for many of my posts. I'm really not doing well at all.
Thanks to Carol Ashby, Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart is back on Kindle, and will be available in paperback soon.
Friends are everything. I couldn't have done it.
Marley, the canine waif from Afghanistan, whom WE helped save, has a Facebook page! Please drop by to see how happy he is today.
If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.
Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.
Perhaps we all are right where we are supposed to be, Andrew! Your words inspire ME and countless others. What I do affects those around me, especially my husband for whom I am caregiver. It's far reaching; farther than we could ever know or understand.
ReplyDeleteYour words always touch me and inspire me; and I thank you for that! Hugs and prayers as always!
Barbara, I am so grateful for this...so honoured by your words!
DeleteHugs and prayers truly appreciated.
Oh, Andrew. Your words like beautiful manna from heaven.
ReplyDeleteBetsy, likewise, for your words...you brought light and joy to a pain-filled evening.
DeleteThank you, Andrew and Barbara.
ReplyDeleteYou have shared everything with such raw beauty,
I wish I could visit your special corner, but I am content to know it exists.
You remind me "to see the world in a grain of sand."
Annie in Texas
Annie, thank you so much for this. We'll meet someday, in that part of heaven that's indistinguishable from Texas.
DeleteI mean, if it isn't pure Texas, how could it be heaven?
Stephanie, thank you...you're exactly right. He supplies the need!
ReplyDeleteGlad to be numbered among the quarter million - and yet to still feel like the one and only. Because ..." how else would I have realized that I am living in a small (and sometimes too quiet!) corner of Heaven, right here, right now?
ReplyDeleteGrace abounds, and I am grateful that you have helped open my eyes to see it,... and remind me that I get the privilege to live it. Thank you. So praying for painlessness to attach itself to the abounding grace. Sleep well, Andrew.
Jane, I cannot tell you how much your words mean to me! I'm really, truly touched and honoured.
DeleteThank you so much for the prayers!
'I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.'
ReplyDeleteThis speaks to me this morning, Andrew, to what I've been wrestling through, experiencing, praying over.
Thanks for speaking truth. I take your words with me. I needed them this morning.
Bless you, friend ...
Awww, Andrew. Such words and thoughts were yours, even a couple of years ago, when that season was the worst you knew. And as things have declined, your heart, your light, continue to shine as you offer hope and life through your words. You, my friend, are amazing.
ReplyDeleteI am continuing to pray for you, Barb, and the dogs.
Jeanne, thank you so much for these words of hope, light, and grace! I'm overwhelmed, and honoured.
DeleteAnd we all truly appreciate your prayers. Today, especially - it was bad.
Kara Tippetts was amazing. I knew her only in the way so many did: through her blog. Jesus, in and through her, made her amazing. I am literally changed because of her. And Jesus. What an amazing team. Only guessing, but seems she'd probably be humbled and touched you used her blog to share more Jesus.
ReplyDeleteEmily, I only came to Kara's blog after she'd passed...and I was awe-struck at her light and faith.
DeleteThe thought that she might in turn be humbled by hat I said...wow.
We are ALL blessed by your determination to be a beacon and source of comfort for those who are caretakers. It's a confusing and draining job, so I know that's why so many have found solace here at your place, Andrew. And I'm continuing to pray that you find all sorts of comforts in the day-to-day that offset the pain and challenges of your disease. I know your dogs are one of those comforts that eases the journey, my friend. I'm so glad you have them by your side! Give them a hug for me!
ReplyDelete