The last week has brought a tidal wave of pain, and my hands are shaking as I write this. I can barely move. Each step, and I'm impaling myself further and deeper, onto the spear.
Rationally, I can see the abyss opening at my feet, pulling me in.
And then I remember the signature line from that fine film Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.
"Rebellions are built on hope."
So is survival.
Somehow, I'm going to find a way through this.
Somehow, I'm going to keep going.
Somehow, my story doesn't end here.
And somehow, I'm going to find the energy and the fortitude...and the words...to write one more book, to say that there is a way back from despair, that the intention to live with the joy and care of love and responsibility will carry the day.
That living for others will bring one out onto the broad sunlit uplands, and that no enemy, not even cancer, can stand against the incandescent brightness of the complete giving of oneself.
I don't know how. Not yet.
But somehow, I'll learn how to say these things.
Somehow, I'll find the words, and the frame in which they can live.
And somehow, I'll last long enough to get that message out, to fly that bright banner from the depths of hell.
Because hell won't win.
Not if we stand together.
Not if we won't let it. (The Five Minute Friday prompt this week is if.)
What better music for this than Journey, with Don't Stop Believin'?
Please pardon my slow response to comments. I do my best, and your comments are really precious to me. Barb is answering many of them now. I'm running on fumes, if you don't mind a macho metaphor.
I'm grateful for the energy to have written this. I'm so glad Barbara's stepped in for many of my posts. I'm really not doing well at all.
Thanks to Carol Ashby, Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart is back on Kindle, and will be available in paperback soon.
Friends are everything. I couldn't have done it.
Marley update... been moved to a sanctuary, and Bay County will revise their 'dangerous dog' codes.
If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.
Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.