Your Dying Spouse 207 - Why I'm Still Here {FMF}

Back again for Five Minute Friday, the weekly get-together and key-word-themed timed writing challenge hosted by the lovely and gracious Kate Motaung.

Yeah, I know. Calling a lady 'lovely' isn't PC, but neither am I, and lovely she is. Deal with it.

As has happened too often in the past few weeks, I'm writing ahead of time. At the moment I have pneumonia, and it is immediately-life-threatening. If I can work the keyword into the theme I will. I just want to be sure there's something to post. (The word's listen, and I worked it in.)

So...I'm over 200 posts in this series. My doctor's kind of shocked, and my wife is flabbergasted. I shouldn't be alive any more. What gives?

I have no idea...and while this is getting harder for me I have been able to keep going. I've stopped working on fiction...just don't have the energy...and I have had to cut back, with regret, on commenting on other blog. Keeping the BPH blog running, with admittedly shorter posts, is taking a lot.

So, what resources are there?

1. GOD - I believe in the Christian God, and I believe that I am being kept viable to fulfill a purpose. I may not know what it is, and it may be far from what I would guess - I may be a cautionary tale rather than an example - but there is a reason for this. The pain and humiliation (read incontinence and fainting, several times today) are not His concern. My performance is.
2. DOG - yes, it's an anagram for God, and no wonder, at least here. We have many, nearly all having arrived at this place of last resort. For some reason - known only to them and their Great Anagram - I have a connexion with these guys that no one else can match. The fiercest maulers let me hold them belly-up, like puppies, and drift off to happy dreams in my arms. This is hard to fathom, for I am, above most everything else, a trained dealer in death. But they see some transcendence, and I won't abandon them.
3. YOU GUYS - The FMF, Books and Such,  Steve Laube Agency, Messy Marriage,  and Inspire Me Mondays communities have carried my heart and soul over some really horrible patches. I never had pen pals; I never really believed in friendships that were not face-to-face. Boy, was I ever wrong. You guys are literal lifesavers.
4. DREAMS - Yes, I still have dreams, and while their attainment is predicated on a restoration of health, working toward them in hope is not. Our dreams are not our own, not really. They're beholden to the Almighty, as concrete symbols of faith, and they're obligations to the community, a shared vision of a general hope that allows us to encourage one another when things seem to hard to bear. Dreams are not ego; they are the debt we owe.

And Barbara? Well, we've been married for either fourteen or twelve years (yes, there was a divorce and remarriage in there, 2003-2004).

And I still live to say good morning to her, every day. And to listen for her reply.

For a musical theme, how about some Christian Metal?

Marley update...he's received a lot of support, but STILL NEEDS HELP TO BE SAVED.

WE ARE MAKING A DIFFERENCE!

He's up to nearly 200,000 signatures, but the local authorities are dragging their feet. They think that we'll give up and go away. We won't.

If you have a mment, I'd like to ask you to visit Change.org to consider a petition to free a 'death row dog' who has been separated from his family for ten months over a misunderstanding. Marley was saved from Afghanistan by a US serviceman; please help make sure this story doesn't end in needless tragedy! Marley's gotten a lot of support...but he still needs our help.

If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.

Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.