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Wednesday, May 15, 2013


What do you do when the medication you used to hold off savage, crushing pain from a crook pancreas doesn't work any more?

This isn't a rhetorical question - I really need to know, and quick!

The other arrow in my quiver - cheap cigars - has gradually been losing effectiveness as well. The nicotine that was acting as an anesthetic is now making me puke.

There are no other medicines to try. We've been through the lot.

The last resort would seem to be meditation. There are a lot of Christians who'll throw up their hands and decry its Eastern roots, but right now the specificity of centering prayer - its Christian analogue - makes it ineffective. Yes, I know, this is more a mark of my weak faith than any deficiency in centering prayer as a technique and tool of faith, but this isn't the time to develop anything. I need results, fast.

Because right now - literally, I'm swooning. I like that word. The world is starting to sway and sweep, swinging sideways in a swoon that will pitch me into the keyboard.

For the tough guys reading this, I'm grinding gears. The pain's like something rotary, just below the diaphragm on the right side. 'Grinding' is a good word to describe it.

And for youse who may be bored silly by now, I'm done.

Any suggestions, need 'em.


  1. Oh boy. I was hoping this wouldn't happen. Helpful suggestions? I got nuthin'. But I am praying for you.

    1. All I have now comes from Winston Churchill -

      Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duties, and so bear ourselves that if the British Empire and its Commonwealth last for a thousand years, men will still say, "This was their finest hour."