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Love and marriage are the greatest adventures in life, and they point they way to our relationship with the Almighty.

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Sunday, May 28, 2017

Your Dying Spouse 316 - Five Vital Words

If you're caregiver to a terminally ill husband or wife, there are five words that I guarantee you, that individual needs to hear.

"We just won the lottery!"

Uh, no. Not those. But they would be nice.

The Five Vital Words are these:

I'd do it all again.

Your husband or wife, in his or her illness, feels like a burden; no question. The things that person could do that now have to be handed over to you, the endless requests that have to be made...and above all the soul-shredding nearness of death.

The late Kara Tippets wrote in a very moving blog post that she wished she could be concerned with the trivial again, that the constant round of fighting for survival wore her out.

Same with your mate.

And he or she knows that it's wearing you out, too.

So you've got to say it, if it's true, that the journey you've taken with this special person was worth it, with no exceptions.

That you'd do it again, even knowing the future.

Because believe me, your spouse needs to hear that, more than anything.

Even more than winning the lottery.

And you know what? Even if no one's circling the drain, you both need to hear those words!

The musical theme is from one of my favourite groups, ELO, with Shine A Little Love:

Still hoping to get the new and improved version of Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart up and running in the near future. Just haven't had the energy to do it yet...but if you would like to read it, please say so in your comment and I'd be glad to send you a PDF (which should fit your Kindle).

I have another blog, "Starting The Day With Grace". The focus is a grace quote from someone you might not expect (like, say Mick Jagger) and a short commentary. I hope you'll join me.

Marley update... been moved to a sanctuary, and Bay County will revise their 'dangerous dog' codes.


And marley has a Facebook page! Please drop by to see how happy he is today.

If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.

Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.


  1. So good.
    We need this reminder that, at no point in our life will we ever say, "I sure wish I'd been a little LESS loving and attentive."

    1. Michele, thank you! And I loved the way you put the counterpoint, "I sure wish I'd been a little LESS loving and attentive." Too funny!

  2. Dear Andrew, your words are so powerful! The hugeness of your heart in sharing them grips me by the throat. Jesus must love you so much for allowing your pain and loss to be a way to reach out to others. Blessings for a joyful day.

    1. Alice, your words do me such honour! I'm just overwhelmed, and deeply grateful to you for sharing these thoughts.

      I do indeed feel loved by the Lord. It makes the pain worthwhile. I wouldn't change a thing.

      Blessings to you...and you did bring joy to my day!

  3. Replies
    1. Jan, thank you so much! I'm so grateful that you're here.

  4. My best to both you and Barbara today.

    Any chance she'd write a guest post for you some day?

    1. Linda, thank you so much...and I will ask Barb. She's really busy with work, and it's a high-pressure environment, but maybe she could dictate a post...

  5. I'd never thought of this before, Andrew, but you are SO right. I would do it all again with Pedro and with Sarah.

    1. Anita, you are truly a blessing to both of them!

  6. Andrew my heart goes out to you and the way you are ministering to others walking that same path.

    That puppy is so cute.

    Congratulations on the books.

    1. Deborah, thank you so much for this...and I'm so glad you like marley!

  7. Yes. Those are important words. Thank you for the reminder. And thank you for continuing to blog through all of your pain. I am grateful! I don't always comment, but I always read your posts. Praying for you and Barbara.

    1. Rachel, thank you so much for commenting!

      We appreciate your prayers; you are in ours.