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Sunday, April 10, 2016

Your Dying Spouse 141 - Pride Goeth

Sometimes the caregiven has to care for the caregiver.

OK, say that three times fast.

I have lately had to give up one of the small household duties to which I'd been attending...washing the dishes. I can't stand at the sink, and a stool is geometrically impossible (it hurts too much to reach). Yes, we have a dishwasher, but we've found that you still have to pre-wash. (So much for advertising claims.)

It wasn't easy. I kept telling Barbara, it's OK, I can do this, I'll feel better tomorrow...but I didn't, and she finally stepped in and said she'd do it.

Giving up was hard. It felt like a step back, but really, it wasn't.

I needed help. And in accepting it, I gave my wife a gift. The gift that says, "I need you".

All I had to do to make that gift was to melt down my pride.

Thus, pride goeth.

And a new measure of love arriveth.

The musical accompaniment is from Petula Clark..."Don't Sleep In The Subway".

Please excuse the brevity of this post. I'm running out of energy.

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  1. Vulnerability opens the way for a wave of love to arrive every time. I appreciate your sharing the way this has worked out in your unique situation.

  2. Giving up pride is not an easy task. But something far better awaits when we peel off that armor ...

  3. Oh God loves you,Andrew! He loves taking the proud, stubborn soldier and transforming him into a strong, humble servant. Still the same ornery soul, but clothed in grace and love.
    The message of "I need you " is so important! Thank you for sharing. And for not putting yourself at risk of broken glass and impaling yourself if you have a fall!

  4. You'll find another niche, or chore, to fill so you can help Barb again...you can only do what you can do; and HE will help YOU and Barb in finding that "something"...you are strong in so many ways, deep inside your inner strength and perseverance shine!

    Let her do it! She is happy to do so, I am sure...{my hubby has his chores; most that I really do not like to do anyway...taking trash out, for instance!!}

    Take care and hold on, my friend! Prayers abound...

  5. Accepting help can indeed be a gift given to the helper. God bless you and your wife, Andrew!

  6. It was a blessing in disguise. Cool.

  7. Oh, it's so hard to accept help! I'm glad you were able to gift her with the need.

  8. Praying for you, Andrew. It's hard to take help sometimes ...