This is my first contribution to Five-Minute Friday, hosted by Kate Montaug. The challenge is to write for five minutes on a given "theme word", posted by Kate on Thursday night...and then stop when the timer dings.
I was introduced to this unique way to deal with a Thursday evening by Jeanne Takenaka. Thanks, Jeanne! (She has a terrific blog - visit her!)
The paragraphs below were done with about three seconds to spare.
Dealing with what my doctor says is a terminal illness - that will kill me quite nastily - makes for some pretty long days and some longer nights. There really isn't anything that relieves the pain any more, so I just have to deal with it.
Minutes can seem like hours sometimes.
But I don't have the worst of it - what's long for me is unbearably long for my wife. She has to watch the man she choose to marry decline long (that word again!) before his time. She has to make plans for a long future without me, without making me feel like I'm becoming excess baggage.
It's something that I would not want to do. Something that I don't know I COULD do.
I have the easy bit. I just have to fight an enemy that is unseen but very active, and I can devote my full energy to that. I have to - and sometimes that makes me less than a nice person.
Survivors don't survive because they're nice. They survive because they are, on some level, ruthless. With themselves, to ensure that they don't back down when the going gets rough; and with others, because pity is weakening, and can't be accepted.
Yeah, I think she longs for the old me, and the times before I had something in common with Patrick Swayze and Luciano Pavarotti.
So do I.