This is a morning rainbow over a mountain called Ladron, which means 'bandit', and is fittingly the peak after which my dear service dog was named, for she stole my heart.
But I can't stop to look back. Not so much because there's a lot ahead, but because the pain of loss leaches the joy from today.
I think that for anyone with cancer, maybe more is lost than is realized.
Like, a shared cup of coffee, or a stroll around the block, or the comfort of a marital bed.
I can scarcely remember what these things were like, and don't want to, because loss will weaken resolve needed for the present moment. There may not be a vast bright future, but I believe, and HAVE to believe, that I still have something worthwhile to give in the now, and that it's wrong to allow sentimentality to dilute that.
So I leave the memories in God's hands, to be unpacked, to live again, in another time and place.
I think back to The Good Old Days,
the hikes, Starbucks, and pillow talks,
offer for them thanks and praise,
then put them in God's attic box
that is marked 'Not To Be Opened'
as I walk upon the Earth;
its seal will stay strong and unbroken
until I pass that great rebirth
into the place of God's own time,
when yesterday lives side by side
with today, fresh in its prime,
and there is no need to hide
from sorrow over what is gone,
for there the past's a bright new dawn.
The Five Minute Friday prompt this week is REPRESENT.
I come from far Mongolia,
perhaps birthed in a tent,
no scent there of magnolia,
so I shall represent
the line to which I have been born,
the Horde and Genghis Khan,
and from this I cannot be torn;
it's simply who I am,
ready now to go and ride,
to raid and loot and pillage;
try to run, or try to hide,
we're coming to your village,
and we'll live in your memory
in our ruthless majesty.
Three minutes flat. Maybe that says something I maybe didn't want folks to know?
Music from The Moody Blues, with I Know You're Out There Somewhere.
Good message for anyone that needs to use "God's Attic Box".
ReplyDelete- Barbara
Everything has a season, even memories, Andrew. I like the sentiment that some things need to be kept in God's Attic Box until the proper time for them to be aired out - for today we need to focus on "being" and not "doing" and today, being is enough.
ReplyDeleteLisa, thank you...and one might, smiling, say that we are human be-ings, and not human doings!
ReplyDeleteThis is a beautiful reflection on what it means to truly dwell in the present. As difficult as it is, we should all really live with this mentality. Blessings, friend!
ReplyDeleteLauren, thank you so much. Living in the present really fulfills what Paul said, that to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
DeleteBlessings back!
Andrew are you a child of God? Have you ever been born again? I don’t know what it is like to be dying of cancer but if you have repented of your sins and trusted in Jesus you will spend eternity in heaven. There will be no more sickness, suffering, sorrow or tears. You will see beautiful and amazing sights, like the Grand Canyon, Niagara Falls, the Rocky Moubtains, the Pacific Ocean. You will live in a mansion and walk on streets of gold. You will be filled with more joy than you have ever had on earth. There will be great feasting in heaven. That is, if you have been born again. If you have never been born again repent of your sins, believe in Jesus and receive Him today. He dearly loves you. He died on the cross for you. He paid for your sins. Eternity is coming soon Andrew. Are you ready? Terri #FMF 7
ReplyDeleteTerri, I have indeed been born again. To know God's love in the reality is just so wonderful!
DeleteI wish I had the words to share it.
Everyone has commented on the serious part, Andrew, but I loved the Mongol hordes. There is something deliciously subversive about them and what they represent. Thanks for the ride!
ReplyDeleteThe Horde rides!
DeleteThank you SO MUCH for this!
Hi,
ReplyDeleteThis is such a beautiful post. I've created life, as a mom, and I've experienced loss of friends and family. Your poem truly resonated with me. Thanks so much for sharing.
-Valerie
Valerie, I am honoured by your comment. I've saved lives, but creating a life...Moms have my deepest respect, and gratitude.
DeletePOWERFUL WORDS πͺπΌπ - FMF 12
ReplyDeleteBarb, thank you so much!
DeleteWe all need the use of God's attic box, all have things that we need to "disremember" for now. May God continued to strengthen you as you pass through these daunting waters.
ReplyDeleteJust stopped by from FMF#16
Heather, I am sure glad He does have that box in the attic! I'll bet He looks inside from time to time, just for fun.
DeleteAndrew, thanks for the reminder to capture the joys of today ... even if they seem small or kind of nebulous. You're right, it's all too easy for it to be leached and lost.
ReplyDeleteLinda, thank YOU. I'm so grateful that cancer taught me the beauty of the moment!
DeleteI don't have cancer, Andrew, but these words are so resonating with my heart. I have a lot to learn from you about making the most of each moment and believing I have something worthwhile still to give even in this moment. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteGrams, your words touch me deeply. I am so glad I have been of help.
DeleteI love the idea of God's attic box. Maybe His photo album of His children too up there? And funny memories and bits of treasure... You've set me off in a dream now. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteDawn, I am absolutely certain that He's got a photo album, at which He and the angels sometimes laugh.
DeleteI loved your represent poem~! Made me smile full well! FMF21
ReplyDeleteAnnette, I'm so glad you enjoyed this!
DeleteAndrew! I LOVE "God's Attic Box"! Wow. And represent is stellar! The things we don't want people to know! How often are they are unearthed in poetry! Prayers continue though i don't get to see your posts as often now.
ReplyDeleteMary, I am delighted that you're here, and that you enjoyed this!
DeleteAnonymous equals Mary Hood. (In this instance)
ReplyDelete