I died in the early morning hours of March 14, 2021, went to Heaven, and came back.
I think I came back...or was sent back...to tell you a bit about it.
As background, I have a serious problem breathing now. Any exertion, I run out of air and sometimes can't draw breath for a bit. Scary, yeah?
So I guess that's what happened. Breath stopped, and I left.
This was not an hallucination brought on by oxygen starvation; I've run out of oxygen underneath a seaweed bed while diving. It wasn't like that at all.
Run out of oxy, everything gets kind of grey and vague and you see weird stuff (like talking sharks). What was salient about this experience was its clarity, and specificity.
It wasn't a dream, either. My dreams are never internally consistent; there are always jarring notes. Not so, in this care. Everything fit together seamlessly.
I did write a narrative (which is consistent with how I described the experience to Barb immediately afterwards; she read it and verified this), but it's too long to post here. I'll give you the highlights.
But first, this is what Barb said...
I, Barb, as an eye-witness to the first telling of the vision saw in Andrew a joy in his eyes that I have never encountered with him through our 20 years. His eyes and countenance glowed , there was a feeling of enlightenment, safety, and calm amid his elated telling and painting of the scene.
The biggest highlight is that it's the culmination of everything you've hoped for, everything you imagined it could be...and far, far better than that.
It is a place of such vivid colours, such green grass, a sky of purest blue and red-gold sunsets, storm-clouds and thunderheads.
It is a place of people, people you knew and perhaps were meant to know, all arriving at the same time and taking with them the best of their souls. There is no room for anger or pettiness or sorrow. Simply no room at all.
No room for feeling triumphant over the devil either; he lost, and that's simply all there is.
It is a place where you might not be recognized at first, because you are seen as you truly are. For me, that was an improvement.
It is a place where we are ageless...where we just are.
It is a place of animals, barking running dogs, and scurrying mice (yes, mice).
It is a place of activity, laughter, music...of things done for their own sake and for no other reason.
It is a place of perfection, of the softest grass you could imagine that you wouldn't hesitate to walk through barefoot...like the best carpet, but alive and growing.
And there are weeds, but they are perfect weeds.
It is a place where you meet the unexpected and immediately say, "Of course...how could it have been otherwise?"
It is a place without limits, where you know that each day will be better than the one before, higher, brighter, wider, deeper...and that is only a foretaste.
Heaven is that place for which we are made, and which has been made for us.
It is not a place where God lives.
Heaven is God.
And coming back, was that soul-shattering? Did I weep for what I'd experienced and for which I now have to wait?
Not at all, because there's still so much to do here...like pass on this message...
What had been hope is now certainty.
What was hope is certainty,
what was hazed, now clear,
and I know there's victory
beyond what I have here.
I have seen the bright green fields,
have heard the joyous song,
but nonetheless, I will not yield,
for it would be wrong
to pack it in a bit too soon;
there is still work to do
beneath harsh sun and cool white moon,
and I must see it through
'till I'm full-poured as His libation,
and Heav'n becomes my duty station.
It's said that no music can equal that of Heaven, but I beg to disagree...John Williams' theme from Jurassic Park does the job quite nicely. (Please click here if your device doesn't load it.)
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ReplyDeleteThis is so beautiful, Andrew. What was it like to see Jesus?
ReplyDeleteGrams, thank you! The encounter was really 'casual'; I think it says in Scripture "He meets you where you are." It was like that.
DeleteI have to admit, I'm not sure what to make of this. It's just outside my paradigm. I'm glad you aren't gone quite yet. :)
ReplyDeleteAnnette, I didn't know what to make of it either, at first; I'm not one for reading "died and gone to Heaven" narratives, and so this experience, so outside anything I've ever encountered, was, to say the least, impressive in that it turned my previous thinking about God and life on its head.
DeleteI am so thankful you returned to share this. Wow. You give us all hope and peace, Andrew. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteKaren
Karen, I'm glad to be back, too...because I really, really want to share this. It's the most important thing that's ever happened to me, and it's now my life's mission, to spread the reality.
DeleteI have to admit, I am glad you are still here. May God keep His hand on both you and Barbara.
ReplyDeleteJoanne, thanks! I'm glad to be here still, because there's still work to do...but going back, for good, will be awesome.
DeleteThis is exciting! "...a place of people, people you knew and perhaps were meant to know, all arriving at the same time and taking with them the best of their souls..."
ReplyDeleteThe pictures you paint remind me of Lewis and Narnia. Goodness awaits us.
Amanda, you're right...'exciting' is a perfect word!
DeleteGoodness does indeed await...and more happiness than you thought possible.
"Not just a place where God lives. Heaven is God." WOW Andrew!!!
ReplyDeleteDeirdre FMF#10
DeleteDeirdre, that realization, when it came, that Heaven is God, changed me forever.
DeleteYAY! I'm so glad you had that experience and shared it joyfully with your wife and US! We are blessed by your many blessings. I pray you continue to live each day to the fullest, and when our time comes I pray we will meet! I've so enjoyed reading your posts through the years of FMF. I haven't written one yet this week. It's spring break for our kids so a bit of a weird week around here. I'm glad my morning tea brought me to your link! Jennifer, FMF
ReplyDeleteJennifer, I'm so glad this brought you joy, because as I've mentioned above...it changed my life, forever. My return has purpose, and my future is assured.
DeleteI always enjoy your posts, too...and will be looking for you next week!
"What had been hope is now certainty." THAT brings tears to my eyes. Thank you, Andrew.
ReplyDeleteSusan, just thinking back on it brings tears of joy to my eyes.
DeleteThank YOU!
It is so profound. I just sent you an email.
DeleteSusan, nothing...absolutely nothing...in this life matches it. The life that waits for us is so far beyond our most extreme hopes...it's just overwhelming...but we won't be overwhelmed, for it's the place for which we were made...
Delete...and which was made for us.
CONVINCED!!! Andrew, how marvelous!!! I totally am blessed by this, and hope is, (no words after) HOPE IS!!
ReplyDeleteMary, yes! There is no more doubt, no more night. The road ahead may be hard, but the destination will banish even the vague memory of tears and pain.
DeleteThere will be no looking behind, for ALL is ahead.
HOPE IS!
I love this description.
ReplyDelete“ It is a place of people, people you knew and perhaps were meant to know, all arriving at the same time and taking with them the best of their souls. There is no room for anger or pettiness or sorrow. Simply no room at all.” Your words remind me of a MercyMe song, “Finally Home.”
Then I'll gaze upon the throne of the King, frozen in my steps. And all the questions that I
Swore I would ask, words just won't come yet. So amazed at what I've seen! So much more than this
Old mind can hold.
[Chorus]
And the sweetest sound these ears have yet to hear the voices of the angels.
Praying for you and Barb,
Jolene
Jolene, yes...and know this, that God is SO glad to see you!
DeleteYour arrival in Heaven will be His Dream Come True.
He really, really is Love.
Tbreit, thank you for being here!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Andrew. Just thanks. :) And praying for you in this time you have left here.
ReplyDeleteLori, thank you, for your affirmation, and for your prayers.
DeleteAndrew, it was fun seeing it through your eyes. Beautiful, magnificent, and glorious. I think of Eden, the world as it should have been, when all is right and the wrong is a forgotten reality. How lovely that you got to see it and then come back to tell us. Makes me eager to go to my real home. Hope this week treats you right. The Lord be with you.
ReplyDeleteMy dear Norma, the Eden description nails it pretty well (though it did not occur to me at the time)...and that 'the wrong is a forgotten reality'...perfect!
DeleteIt is the real home, and I'm looking forward to seeing it again, but first, there's just so much to say, so much encouragement to give!
It'll be there when I get there, and I'll see YOU there, too!
Andrew, as always your words come alive with rich artistry! I just heard the song “I Want to Stroll Over Heaven With You Someday”, and won’t it be glorious when we’re all there walking arm and arm in our glorious Home!
ReplyDeleteCindy, what a lovely song...and what a lovely thing to look forward to!
DeleteWhat an experience, Andrew. I hope it makes you feel much more at peace with yourself. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteCorinne, it was the greatest experience of my life, and so completely reassuring!
DeleteHugs back!
Andrew, wow! Thank you for sharing this. Your words truly do inspire a reassurance of hope that this place, this life, is a pale reflection of what and where we are truly meant to live. I am praying for you and Barb.
ReplyDeleteJeanne, I think that's why I was sent back, to speak of this, to provide that reassurance and hope...the hope that lies in our true home, the place we were made for, and which was made for us. And I'll do my best.
DeleteWe thank you so very much for your prayers!
Wow. The beauty of this message. Extremely reassuring. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad this reached your heart, Lee Ann!
DeleteI had to read this twice, because I cried the first time through. I just had a friend die, and reading this description of Heaven was so amazing. I love that Heaven IS God, not just the place where he lives. I love that even mice are running around, and that surprises are around every corner, but that they make you say, "Of course!" What an incredible blessing God gave you to allow you to see Heaven. Barb's description of you reminds me of Moses after he spent time with God in the mountain top. His countenance glowed because of being in the presence of God. I imagine that was you!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this miraculous vision with us.
Miccah
La Vie de Miccah Marie, please forgive my delayed response, and please accept my sincere thanks for your words.
DeleteI am so sorry for the loss of your friend, but know that everything's going to be OK. Nothing good is lost, and everything you hoped for cannot begin to approach what you'll receive.
The experience burns brighter in me than it did when it happened; everything will be OK.
There's an axiom in pastor/teacher circles that goes something along the lines of, "Everything you preach, you have to pay for." Brother, you paid the ultimate price to preach the ultimate truth! Your joyful certainty will be broadcast across the world, reaching those who needed exactly your insight, exactly your words, to believe. I'm so very grateful you went; more grateful you returned. Praise the God who is ALL!
ReplyDeleteEllie, please forgive my delayed response...and thank you for this. The price I have paid 9and am paying today...not wanting to be too far from the dunny) is well worth the experience, and the chance to tell of it, that hope is now certainty.
DeleteI am so honoured, and blessed!