Satan came in the middle of the night, when the cancer-pain was at its worst.
"How's it going?" he asked.
"Same same."
"Hard to die a failure, eh?"
"Yeah, well..."
Satan's a liar, but the most effective lies are 99% true.
My life is a litany of failure, failure mainly due to the sins of pride and avarice.
I failed Barb. I didn't hear, or listen to, the things she neeed from our marriage. I'm darned lucky she's the forgiving sort. I was on a bender, chasing projects and plans, and left her in the background.
I saved a lot of unwanted dogs, but never really got to know most of them. They're loved, they're cared for (and they tend to live a few years longer than most...16 and 17-year-olds are the norm), but I only got to know, really, a few. I was chasing other things at the same time. I let them slide. I wanted to write books, race cars, and build aeroplanes and speedboats, for Pete's sake. What screwed-up priorities.
And I failed myself; most of my high-flown plans got nowhere, because, like the Bible dude who tried to build a tower without checking his resources, I couldn't finish them.
Then God showed up. "He's right, you know," saith the Lord.
"Say WHAT?"
"You failed at the things you planned, and you faile due to your sin. That's flat."
I was silent. Having these dudes in agreement, I was in big trouble.
"However..." And then God continued speaking, and Satan silded himself out the door.
God's didn't say it's all right, that He'll fix everything.
He didn't offer Double for my Trouble, or to turn my setbacks into setups for greater things.
He didn't say that my purposes will be fulfilled.
He did say that His purposes are fulfilled. Always.
He did say, "Your sins are forgiven."
And He said that if I accept that forgiveness, I am His, and He is mine, that His purpose for me is my salvation through Him.
Satan came at midnight,
an urbane, well-spoke
man,
and said, “Do I have
this right,
you failed in every
plan?
You failed your dogs and
lovely wife,
you failed at writing’s
purpose;
broken dreams now line
your life,
and I guess that means
you’re worthless.”
And God said, “Boy, that
is all true,
but I know something
deeper;
what your sin has done
to you,
no matter, you’re a
keeper,
for however bad you've been livin’,
it’s over now, and you’re
forgiven.”
The most appropriate music I could find was The Weight, performed by The Band. If the video doesn't appear, click here.
NO condemnation for those of us in Christ, so don't let the accuser win; we have an advocate with the Father - Jesus and He is not a failure. xx
ReplyDeleteFiona,f you're so right...Jesus is our advocate, not a failure, an NEVER ails us!
DeleteI loved the "however" that shut Satan up. We are all keepers and have been forgiven by God's grace.
ReplyDeleteWemi, thank you so much...that 'however' makes all the difference, doesn't it?
Delete(((((Andrew)))))
ReplyDeleteYes, yes, YES!
Hugs from Annie in Texas
((((((Annie!))))))
DeleteThank you!
This was beautiful that our acceptance and worth has absolutely nothing to do with our achievements but all about God's grace. Thank you, your writing is powerful!
ReplyDeleteSharon, thank you so much!
DeleteSeveral 99% true lies here, too, Andrew. But by the grace of God, we are forgiven. Thanks for speaking Truth. Prayers for you and Saint Barbara.
ReplyDeleteSusan, thank you so much or your prayers...and Barb is indeed a saint!
DeleteOne of your best.
ReplyDeleteSusan, I'm honoured.
DeleteThis is beautiful, but Andrew, I hope you can know how MUCH God has used you, that you really haven't failed in life, that we all lose focus and direction (and yes we are forgiven), but AH! God uses our mess-ups, too. You have graced all who read your posts. SO MUCH. Love! Karen :) FMF #10
ReplyDeleteAmen!
DeleteKaren (and Grams), thank you so much for this lovely affirmation!
DeleteLove back! <3
God's truths are always better than satan's lies!
ReplyDeleteAnita, so true!
DeleteI love how that "however" turns everything around!
ReplyDeleteLesly, that 'however' of God's does change the game, eh?
DeleteAndrew what a beautiful realization, that though we mess everything up, we are forgiven, just for the taking! I always fail at everything! Yet my success story is God forgives me and keeps forgiving me, cause I keep failing. So agree with Satan. Yes I fail. AGREE WITH GOD! Yes I'm forgiven. Satan is the biggest deceiver, but Jesus is the ultimate redeemer! You didn't fail your dogs. You rescued them!
ReplyDeleteMary, that's beautiful, the way you put it, that God's forgiveness is one's biggest success story!
DeleteAndrew, this is beautiful and so powerful, and now I'm all teary. If you only knew how many people (myself included) you've impacted and encouraged through your writing. And I agree with Mary, that you did not fail your dogs. Love you, Andrew. Your honesty and openness are inspiring, and I believe that recognizing our failures can be a blessing in disguise because it keeps us humble. (((Hugs))) Grams
ReplyDeleteGrams, I'm truly honoured and humbled by your words. All I can say is, I will keep trying to do my best.
DeleteThe past 24 hours have been something of an ordeal, but still...the requirement to try doesn't fade.
Hugs back!
How grateful we all are that God is so forgiving. We all fall short but by grace no one deserves we are saved. We all have a past and all are saved and used by God. Andrew you inspire so many and bring God alive I ways people can understand. God bless you. Fmf #27
ReplyDeleteLoretta, you're so right...Go's forgiveness is the linchpin.
DeleteThank you so much for your kind words, and affirmation!
You are a wordsmith for the lord, Andrew! Thank you for this story - and the truth of it!
ReplyDeleteBlue Cotton Memory (I LOVE that!), thank YOU!
DeleteAhhh, Andrew. There's so much in here. You had me smiling in a couple of places. We've ALL failed. We've all let people (and our animals) down. We've all fallen short of who we thought we could be. But God . . . His purposes are higher. His intentions often use our failings for His greater glory. Some things we've done can't be redeemed, but our Father works in hearts, redeeming those broken places.
ReplyDeleteAnd your words . . . your thoughts are powerful, encouraging, inspiring. I suspect God's used you in ways you won't realize until you're with Him face-to-face and He shows you just how deeply you've delighted Him.
I'm praying for you and Barb, my friend.
Jeanne, you're so right...we all have our failures, our broken places, but God works tirelessly to redeem them
DeleteI'm so grateful for your encouraging words, and for your prayers.
Crazy life. Crazy how it is. Crazy how it all can seem worthless. But crazy isn't true. Nothing is wasted. It matters. We matter. It all matters. Jesus matters. Why does it matter?. Life is beautiful. It's beauty helps lessen its indignities. Humor helps us smile at life. Friendship makes it sweet. Today ash was in th sky and on our cars. I thought of my good fortune to be safe as I drove to my destination. Praying for you.
ReplyDeleteMy dear Norma, 'crazy isn't true' is sheer genius!
DeleteI love the hope, afirmation, and lyricism in your words, and I am so grateful for your prayers.
Sounds like Satan has been a constant companion of yours, whispering his condemnation in your ear, Andrew! I'm so glad that you listened to God's loving and forgiving voice--letting Him settle the matter for you! Yes, I can relate! I've run after too many things that really didn't matter all that much. I just pray that God will redeem what I fouled up and multiply what I did right for Him. I suspect He's doing that for you too, my friend! Love your poem once again!
ReplyDeleteBeth, you're so right; Satan's been here always, doing his very worst.
DeleteBut God's here too, and He makes all the difference.
I'm so glad you enjoyed the poem, and that you stopped by!
Stephanie, thank you...you made my day!
ReplyDeletePraise the One that holds us....He IS the Overcomer!! Roman 8: 38-39
ReplyDeleteMelissa, He is indeed the overcomer! Thank you!
Delete