We're also with Weekend Whispers, and Inspire Me Monday.
Dying can be a pretty lonely business.
It prys you away from the life that rushes past you, and throws you into a gyre in which everything is redolent of raw meat and steel and gunpowder.
Every day is literally life and death.
You don't get to escape; there are no days off. There's no respite time.
The enemy isn't at the gates; he's in your living room, and you're fighting hand-to-hand while your family's watching TV.
And that's as it should be.
I don't want my wife to experience the change in worldview I have gone through; she has had her own changes, inevitably, but to her there's still something to be gained from cheering on her favourite on America's Got Talent.
She can still experience the thrill of victory, and the agony of defeat as it applies to sports; it can still matter to her, because she can step back. I want her to have that respite.
I can't. My life's narrowed down to a single point; get through the next minute, and keep writing, keep trying to make this all mean something.
That's life and death for me.
I don't want her to be in this sometimes humourless and always ruthless vale of wrath.
I want her to have the sunlight.
As an extra note, the support she has given me, and that of my online family, has been something I could not do without; 'alone' in this context doesn't discount those. It merely means that I have to refrain from making my situation the most important thing that's happening in my wife's life (it is, but I don't need to emphasize it), and refrain from making it all revolve around me.
Life goes on; it should, and I want it to.
The last few days have been among the worst I have faced; I am glad to still be living. Being afraid to sleep, in case you don't wake up...saying to your wife, "Well, just in case...if this is it, it's been fun, and I'd do it again" followed by a fist-bump...all that's kind of a bummer.
And this post was terribly hard to write. I don't want to face these things; I don't want to have to do this analysis, this dissection of a fell process.
But it's my job.
We're linked with the Wedded Wednesday,
We're linked with the Wedded Wednesday,
There are no words but these- I am incredibly blessed by your story, your perseverance and your willingness to allow us to walk with you in this journey. Thank you so much! Prayers are always being said for you and your wife! Blessings along the journey!ReplyDelete
Mary, thank you so much. The past few days have been hellish - and it's simply horrible as I write this - but the uplifting support from the FMF community means the world to me.Delete
If anyone wants to see Jesus...look to FMF. He's there.
Andrew- I'm praying that you have the energy and courage to keep fighting - one battle at a time. May you experience God's peace and comfort, a miraculous respite, right there in your living room. Praying for you and your wife.ReplyDelete
Karen, thank you so much...and I do get miracles every day. I collapsed at the computer a couple of hours ago, and was able to summon the strength to get back up, and keep going.Delete
I don't have that kind of strength. Only God does.
Thank you so much for the prayers. They mean a lot to both of us.
Andrew, your presence every week at Five Minute Friday has been such a blessing for me and countless other writers, I know. Thank you for inviting us into your story and allowing us a glimpse into what it looks like to suffer *with* Christ. Though I can't even imagine what it's like for you, I'm always encouraged by the hope you share in your posts and comments--a hope that can only come from a God who is with you even in those very moments you feel alone. Praying for you and your family tonight!ReplyDelete
Thank you so much, Asheritah. It's a privilege to be here, and the support and love I have received from this marvelous community is part of the miracle that keeps me going.Delete
Truly, God's hands are at work in FMF.
Thank you for the prayers; they're very important to me, and I feel them around me even on the darkest nights.
Andrew, you did it again. Tears in my throat, my eyes. It feels shallow to say thank you for baring your heart this way. For giving us glimpses into this reality of death. But you help me understand so much better what you—and others—are going through.ReplyDelete
Your testimony, your perspective, your words—challenge me to have a more selfless way of seeing life. As always, you're in my prayers day and night.
Jeanne, you do me very great honour with your words. In all humility...thank you.Delete
The feedback I get through comments has been a huge boon in helping to refine the arc of this story...and the prayers are helping to prolong it!
Oh Andrew, thank you for continuing to be so honest and raw here. You do not go this alone because we will continue to pray. But like you said, we can't take it on for you. I keep coming back to that Romans verse I shared with you before. "Whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lords."ReplyDelete
Definitely not alone, Tara - I am surrounded by a depth of warmth and love I could never have imagined.Delete
I love that verse from Romans. It's on the refrigerator, here. I read it aloud daily...thank you for that!
I am on the fringe of FMF, not quite yet a five minute writer like you pros. But I visit and read. I'm on a blanket under palm trees reading blogs, and your story well, it deeply touched me, made me think of the beauty in such simple moments, the love if family, of writing and sharing stories, but sick or well, God shines forth, carrying us through the thorny days toward His place has waiting for us. And you shine such a light on all of these deeper meanings. I cried reading your blog. I complained a good part of the day about the heat a, and here you struggle with each moment. Your writing is s gift to me this evening. Blessings to you Andrew.Delete
Kathy, thank you so much for being here! I hope we'll see your efforts on FMF. It's more fun than you would guess.Delete
Each moment is a gift...but believe me, I complain about the heat, too, at least inside my own head. We're having a hot, damp summer in central NM, and...ugh. I like dry heat better.
Thank you again for being here, and thank you for the warmth of your comment, and its kindness. I truly appreciate it.
I can't get you off of my mind, how you blessed me. I noticed the full moon last night, even though weary from a long day, I wanted to ignore it's magnificence. You were on my mind. I stopped for several moments. And woke to listening to birds singing longer than I'd do. Gosh, Andrew, thank you for the blessings you bestow in your suffering.Delete
Brother, I wish I was sitting next to you so I could squeeze your hand. You give us all such wonderful insight and perspective. I pray that God grants you respite from the pain this evening.ReplyDelete
Marie, thank you...that sentiment means a lot, and yes, a squeeze of the hand can be so vitally important. (I have a heeler who likes to do that, but she leaves tooth marks...).Delete
It's a hard evening, but the joy I have in participating in FMF is some anodyne for the pain...thank you so much for the prayers!
wow, thanks for Five Minute Fiving! I'm a long-time friend of Tara's and came over here from her blog. Peace and hope to you, to me, to every one of us.ReplyDelete
Peace and love...yes. Absolutely. I am so glad you're here, and added this!Delete
Andrew, I admit I thought of you first when I saw the prompt, and then I read Kate's post. You will be a part of my post tomorrow morning, should Jesus give us that.ReplyDelete
Your post is heartfelt and heart full. And community is what Jesus designed us for. Thank you for reaching out to me and making me want to come back each week. You are a blessing.
As you are a blessing in my life, Tammy. You've opened my eyes to aspects of faith that I had only heard of...or of which I was completely ignorant.Delete
Thanks to you, I walk closer to God, and can see His face more clearly...and you know what?
He's always grinning, like He's about to tell a world-beating joke...
...or one that's an absolute groaner.
Andrew, you stinker! You made me cry again! And that will make you grin, so I embrace the tears.Delete
I am unwilling to take credit for God bringing You revelation, but in humble awe that it happened in my writing.
Sorrow is an Earthy gift that causes us to appreciate joy. "Though the sorrow may last for the night, His joy comes in the morning."
But your dead will live, Lord; their bodies will rise— let those who dwell in the dust wake up and shout for joy— your dew is like the dew of the morning; the earth will give birth to her dead.
I love this comment, Tammy...now you brought tears to my eyes. And the Isaiah passage is one of my favourites (along with Isaiah 6, which forms the spiritual core of the best and most Christian film I've ever seen, "Fury").Delete
Yes, the dead will live. We be young again, and we will laugh again.
Actually, I'm still young, and still laughing!
The revelation comes from God; but you are the intelligent instrument who brought it to life.
Andrew-In writing you are giving your wife, family, friends, and strangers the perspective of death and dying. It IS something we will all face, and it is human to want to puzzle over it. Praying you find time to enjoy the glimmers of hope God gives you today. To laugh, to love, and to anguish is all part of the roller coaster. Praying you don't throw up on your final day. May it be peaceful. Carry on...all the way to the gates of heaven. We each are blessed to see others smile. Sweet that you gift that to your wife. Jenn, A fellow FMF writer who has yet to write...came here first. Fist bump to on of the few males that joins us boldly to write for 5 each Friday!ReplyDelete
Romans 5:4-5 [Full Chapter]
There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we’re never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can’t round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!
Jennifer, I LOVE what you said..."Praying you don't throw up on your final day"!Delete
My service-dog-in-chief (I have two) wholeheartedly agrees. Yesterday I puked on he, she needed a bath...and she's a Heeler. A RED Heeler. She was mad as a hornet.
I still find things to enjoy in life, every day. It's a matter of attitude, to choose to see them. God makes the beauty, in places and times and people, but the appreciation's up to us.
I really enjoy being part of the FMF community, and it was quite awhile before I realized that there weren't many guys. But it's OK; I can always wear a kilt.
And thank you so much for the Romans 5. I love that passage.
Andrew, glad you are still among those of us living here on earth because your words do have meaning. I thank you for being willing to share your perspective with the world.ReplyDelete
Continuing to pray for you and your wife.
Thank you so much, Michele, for the kind thoughts, and especially for the prayers.Delete
Still in the fight; I won't leave until the very bitter end of the very last minute. The fight is worthwhile; life is GOOD.
Andrew, your words are so meaningful and know what it costs you (physically and emotionally) to write them make them even more so. You are right that even it the dying, others in our lives need a respite, a chance to do "normal", if even for a few minutes. Bless you for realizing that and giving such a precious gift to your wife and other family. May God continue to show Himself faithful to you in every single minute until you see His face. Praying for you again today.ReplyDelete
Thank you so much, Holly; God is indeed faithful, and I see His goodness every day; against all that, what is a little thing like dying? I have love for all eternity to balance the pain.Delete
I have learned a lot from your writing, Holly; you've made my faith journey, my spiritual story arc, that much more coherent, and I thank you for that.
And for the prayers, because I fully believe in their efficacy. They hold me up when my strength fails.
Andrew, your post moved me deeply. While I have never been terminally ill, I have walked beside those who have been. It is true that even while there are those around you, you are the one facing it alone. Yet our God is there with you, and in you. You are a brave & kind man to realize that your wife needs moments of "normal" in order to continue on. You give her the gift of time & memories as you let her experience "normal". Praying for you & her this morning. May our God strengthen you both & bring you the assurance of His Presence. Blessings today.ReplyDelete
Thank you so much, Joanne! It can be a lonely road, but it's also a hermitage of sorts; a place where God and I can talk it out.Delete
And I love seeing Barbara enjoy the Normal; seeing her laugh at Penn and Teller this evening was a gift.
I really appreciate the prayers; as Tennyson said, thus is the world bound 'round the feet of God with Golden chains.
Andrew, I've never commented, but I've read parts of your story. I'm part the FMF community too. It's true, you will die alone, but you won't leave this earth alone, you will be before the face of God. You will suffer no more, and for that your wife, family, friends and this community will be grateful. Your presence will be missed, but somehow, with strength from the Lord, your wife will go on, and every time she misses you so deep that she thinks she's going to die too, she'll remember that you suffer no more and will be grateful. I watched my loving Aunt take care of my precious Uncle through 20 years of illness, until he was battle weary. His perspective was this,"if I live, I'll enjoy living, if I die,I'll be with the Lord" He is missed, and you will be too! Praying for you and yours. God's richest blessings to you and yoursReplyDelete
I'm so glad you commented today; your words send my heart soaring. Yes, indeed...if I live I'll enjoy living, and if I die I'll be with the Lord.Delete
Sounds like a win-win to me!
Thank you so much for the prayers; they are precious to us.
I am praying for you, beloved one. May you be enveloped by peace, may you be strengthened in love, and may your joy overflow. I am so sorry that this is how your journey goes. Hugs and deepest, visceral, gut wrenching prayers for you to rest in His faithfulness. You are so dear to Him! Surrounding your family and loved ones and you with prayers for Duet. 33:27 to be your reality. "The eternal God is your refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms." Shalom, Gracie K.
Oh, Gracie! Thank you so much for this lovely, prayerful comment. I will post it on my refrigerator, and it will be written on my heart.Delete
I love the image of The Everlasting Arms. Thank you for that reminder, so beautifully and kindly presented.
"I want her to have the sunlight." Representative of the gracious writer we have come to love. Thank you.ReplyDelete
It's what I feel with all my heart.Delete
Thank you for being here; thank you for your love and support. They mean the world to me.
Andrew, I'm fairly new to FMF and, I'm sorry to say, this is the first of your posts I've seen/read. I plan to go back and read your entire blog as I can. I don't know what to say. I lost my then-48 year old husband after a 6-wk cancer battle in Sept. 2009. Try as I might then and again since reading your post last night, I cannot imagine what he went through and what you're going through now. My heart breaks for you, for your family and loved ones, and I will be praying for all of you -- daily, throughout the day.ReplyDelete
Oh, Patti - my heart goes out to you. I'm so sorry you had to take that road, and far, far too early in life. You're in my prayers as I write this.Delete
We appreciate your prayers, far more than you can know; in my daily routine I feel the prayers of my friends as a warm wave, buoying me up when my legs want to give out.
And they give me the strength to write on, with topics that, admittedly, get tougher as I go deeper into this experience.
Shielding your wife from a focus on what's negative and giving her times of respite are tremendous acts of love. Thank the Lord that, even in the midst of a trial the magnitude of which most of us will never face, you are able to keep loving, keep writing, keep showing Christ in what you do. Praying for you today.ReplyDelete
Melissa, thank you...yesterday my wife asked me what she could do to help me, and the only reply I could give was 'Take care of YOU; take care of the person whom I love most in all the world."Delete
Thank you for the prayers; they are my shield against annihilation. They are the biggest part of what keeps me going.
Thinking of you, Andrew. Helen xxxReplyDelete
Thank you so much, Helen; the water is high today, but what better time to go surfing?Delete
There is always joy to be found, if I turn my eyes outward, and open them.
I read this last night, Andrew, just now commenting. I didn't know the full extent of your situation, but I did wonder. I spent time in prayer for you and will continue to do so. You are not alone.ReplyDelete
Thank you, Ruthie; indeed, I am not alone. There are so many arms holding me up, so many voices whispering "Hang on!"Delete
I so appreciate the prayers. Truly
Andrew, my friend, all the right words or the write words, whatever...to say to you - I don't have, don't even pretend to have. So, what do I know? You are brave. You are thoughtful. You are mindful of others. You want to live. You want to sleep without fear. And, this one....(like no one has said it to you yet), you are not alone. Oh my friend, this journey...ReplyDelete
You have the right words, Susan, and I will hold them, and the love they carry, close to my heart.Delete
Thank you so much!
When you step into Eternity all this time of pain and suffering will seem like it only took an instant.ReplyDelete
That is something to which I do look forward...while no one draws pleasure from pain, there is yet satisfaction to be standing yet...on every metaphorical 'bloody morning after'.Delete
To speak of God's love, and bear witness, for another day, to His faithful Heart.
We all live in our own situations - "alone" - yet, we are not along. HE is forever and always with us; and we do have our friends and family and online folks we don't even know. But, it is so true that we - these people who share our lives in one way or another - we cannot go through the pain FOR you; but we can surely be there WITH you, whether physically (as your Barb can be there with you as often and as much as possible), or mentally or spiritually or through cyber-space...we can still be WITH you. And, know that I - we - are with you!ReplyDelete
Prayers continue; not only for you, but for Barb and any and all others in your close family/friend make-up...
And yes, Barbara...I do feel everyone with me. It's something that brings a buoyancy that is beyond measure, that really defines the aphorism 'Hope Floats'.Delete
We really appreciate the prayers. The past few days have been vicious. The night will hurt, but there is always another dawn.
Andrew, once again you have written such a powerful, raw post. Thank you for your honesty. Praying for you and your family right now. May you have the strength and the peace that passes all understanding to face each moment as it comes. I am so impressed by your ability to give even when so much is being taken from you. Thank you for being an example of giving every last drop of energy in love to your family and community. You've been a blessing to me even though we only met through FMF last week, and you're blessing so many others as well. May you know God's presence beside you today.ReplyDelete
Katy, thank you so much for the kindness in your words, and the love that lies behind them. Tho' much is taken, as Tennyson said, much abides.Delete
What has been taken has been replaced by something far more valuable, and infinitely more enduring - a capacity to love the God who walks me through this, and the people who hold me up when my legs, metaphorical or real, do not.
I feel God's presence, yes...but if I did not, I would only have to read through these comments to hear His voice.
Thank you for being here today, and for the prayers.
Andrew, I stumbled upon your website via Five Minute Friday. Oh my goodness...so grateful to have found your blog. Thank you for your honesty, transparency in what you and your family are going through in the gritty, raw reality of dying. Praying for you, your wife, family and friends.ReplyDelete
I'm so glad you're here, Susan. Thank you for reading, and commenting - and above all thank you for the prayers, because they are truly what give me the strength to go on.Delete
Alone but not alone.ReplyDelete
Absolutely, Norma. It's a hermitage; in this space, I clearly hear the prayers of my friends, and the heartbeat of God.Delete
Andrew, visiting from fmf. I have no but a song I'd like to share: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=De9qqohtfWI May it bless you and your wife. <3ReplyDelete
Thank you for the lovely, lovely song! We both appreciate it...and appreciate the care you took to choose it, a gift of grace.Delete
A man was being chased by a tiger. In trying to escape, he tumbled over a cliff and grabbed hold of a shrub that grew near the top. Above, the tiger licked it's chops. Below him was a crushing fall. Just then, a delicious smell grabbed his attention. He turned his head an saw a beautiful, ripe, red strawberry. Reaching out one hand, he plucked the fruit and ate it.ReplyDelete
I pray you discover many ripe, red strawberries on the adventure you are now undergoing. (Not all adventures are pleasant.) And sing in the shower or just for the joy of it. Sing because the worst that can happen is that you will wake in God's arms.
Thanks for stopping by and thanks for bearing your soul.
Drusilla, I love this story (and I love you blog!). Thank you for this grace on what has been rather a trying day.Delete
It's really a win-win situation. Live, and I continue witnessing. Die, and I'm high-fiving Jesus.
I do sing; there are many dogs here (we have a sanctuary for the unwanted small souls with big hearts), so it is always a chorus.
Thank you for being here. I truly appreciate you.
"I want her to have the sunlight" - Shakespeare couldn't compete with that - not the words - not the heart it comes from. My husband's been teaching my son's lately - the newly married one especially, about how, even though his wife might be fiercely independent, she needs him to take care of her - that women were designed by God to need their men to take care of them - not just in the warrior and hunter ways - but in the ways that bring the sunlight - the as-full-as-you-can-get of it. I see that in your post - because you have that warrior/hunger spirit steeped in God, you can capture that sunlight and bring it to her! What a testament to your love for each other!ReplyDelete
You put this beautifully (and you could give Shakespeare a run for his money!). My wife is that combination of almost militant independence, and fragility - it's a challenge to be able to honour both parts appropriately.Delete
One does one's best, and hopes for the grace of the Almighty to make it work.
Thank you so much for being here!
Your honesty and willingness to be vulnerable are an honor to witness. These are things people are reluctant to articulate, but I can say that I wondered about these things from my Dad's perspective when he was slowly discovering just how sick he was. Ultimately we are alone, even when we're surrounded by people who love us deeply who would do anything to help lessen our sorrow or suffering. Trying to settle down into the presence of our Comforter can feel at one moment like an intellectual exercise, and the next like being enfolded in the arms of someone as physically real as we are. But I pray you will feel that presence just as I hope you can feel the sun on your face today. Blessings, FMF friendReplyDelete
Thank you so much for your kind thoughts and words - you're absolutely right, that sometimes leaning back into those Everlasting Arms can feel awfully intellectual.Delete
But more and more, I find that there is a feeling of security. What exactly comes after this life, I don't know, but the sense of continuity, of being part of a larger Eternal story is very real. I don't have to worry; my mind and heart are free to allow me to do my best today.
And I do feel the sunlight on my face; even when the storm clouds gather.
Thank you so much for the prayers; I wholeheartedly believe in, and feel their power.
I'm so grateful for this bittersweet look you give us, Andrew, into the Valley of Death. My mom died years ago and it was a rather sudden death. My dad knew that he had a terminal illness that would kill him in months and I tried to spend much time with him, but did not get into his head and heart like you've done for us here. You've invited us in day after day, week after week. And not only that, but you've given us insights that will help not only the terminally ill, but the caretaker and those who love them both. Thank you for your "pain"staking work each day and week, my friend. You are in my thoughts and prayers.ReplyDelete
Oh, Beth, thank you for this. I wanted to do something that could help, because it can be a far more difficult and lonely road than it has to be, this path into the valley of the shadow from which only one will emerge.Delete
I won't say they are not hard to write; certainly, they are. But they do, in the longer run, tend to refine my heart, and make the days far more sweet than bitter.
Thank you so much for the prayers. This would not be possible without them.
Andrew, I am continually blessed by your perseverance and the "fight in you". I know you feel weak most days, but God is there giving you strength and sustaining you for the next day. Thank you for allowing us to take this journey with you. My thoughts and prayers are with you, and your wife. Please keep fighting!ReplyDelete
And thank you, Barbie, for coming along on this journey. You've taught me much, and so has everyone who's contributed. This has become very much a collaborative effort.Delete
We truly appreciate the prayers...and I am, and shall remain in the fight. I still want to see tomorrow.
Andrew, your words are an encouragement, and your attitude towards all of this shifts my outlook on things. I think it's so easy to get caught up in the busyness life that we miss out on so much. But your testimony here inspires me not to ignore the small things, because the small moments are as powerful as the big one in life. How we choose to live in the everyday moments speaks louder than how we choose to live during those moments when we're on display. And you show that through how you fight your battle and how you choose to live life fully, despite what your going through.ReplyDelete
Some people say we should live like we're dying. But you prove we should live like we're living...full out for God. Cherishing every moment and using them all for the glory of God.
Praying for you and your family, and thank you so much for your encouragement. You've no idea what your words mean to me and this whole community.
Live like we're living...full out for God.Delete
That is PERFECT. I might have taken "live like you're dying" and recast it as "die like you're living", but you absolutely nailed the essential truth. Thank you!
And thank you so much for the prayers, and the kind thoughts and words. I'm a channel for the grace, love and encouragement I;ve received.
Best job I ever had!
"There are no days off." That is sticking with me, Andrew. Praying for you, for your wife.ReplyDelete
But today I could sure USED a day off! Man...it was rough. But I'm still here.Delete
And I thank you for being here, Lisa, and for your prayers.
Reading this poem just now made me think of some of the things you've written here.ReplyDelete
Also I was reminded by this short poem also by Annie Johnson Flint:
"For Thou Art With Me"
I know not when I go, nor where,
From this familiar scene;
But Christ is here and He is there
And all the way between;
And, when I pass from all I know
To that dim, vast unknown,
Though late I stay, or soon I go,
I shall not go alone.
Thank you! These are lovely poems, and they are going up on one of the kitchen cabinets. They frame so well those things that both my wife and I must bear in mind.Delete
I truly appreciate this; Annie Johnson Flint is a gift.
This comment has been removed by the author.ReplyDelete
your words, brother, are a precious gift, that our Papa draws out of your vulnerability in brokenness... they give definition to the right grieving that comes about from the utter lostness of this world... tempered with the ray of the only Hope there is... the One who loves in and through and despite and because of and over all the broken. i can't wait to meet you in Heaven, where your Family will rejoice together at what He has done in you.ReplyDelete
Angela, you said this just beautifully, and truly warmed my heart.Delete
'Tempered with the ray of the only Hope there is..." I know something about tempering steel, and it really resonates for me. Thank you so much!
High five in heaven!
Andrew I missed the link-up from FMF but found you on Inspire Me Mondays and well, you got me again. Everything narrows down to that intense focus of living and dying - and doing both with God's grace. Your journey is an inspiration to keep that focus of living each moment with love, passion and purpose. God bless you, and prayers for your wife as well!ReplyDelete
Oh, Carol, thank you so much! I'm glad you're here.Delete
You're right, the focus does narrow, and sometimes that creates a disconnect between 'me' and 'the world'.
Case in point - this evening, my wife complained that I spoke harshly, and my reply - of which I am NOT proud - was, "This has been a very harsh day."
Yes, it was...but I have no right to impose my focus upon her. It's not fair, because a focus is organic to a situation. You can't manufacture it.
I did apologise, with all sincerity.
Thank you so much for the prayers, Carol. They are needed.
Hi Andrew, I dont know what to say.ReplyDelete
You are loved!
I am praying along with this community for your family.
I've been around FMF for awhile but somehow this week is the first I've found you. And this weekend I'm going to read more, more, more. Thank you for your bold, honest words and for the faith and truth you share. Praying that today is a day of more smiles than tears, more sunshine than clouds, more ice cream than broccoli.ReplyDelete
Yours is such a beautiful story of love toward your wife. Your journey is difficult. I can't imagine it and my own imagination doesn't want to. In fact, we would all rather step away and go back to our happy life and not think about the ugly things but focus on the easy. Your story is of bravery and courage. I am learning much from reading your journey. Thank you for sharing your words with us! You are loved!ReplyDelete