Well, five's still a lot. let's try three.
- Do at least one job that you consider 'women's work' - Are there chores in your house that are gender-specific? Like the dishes? Like the laundry? Do you even know HOW to turn on the vacuum cleaner (Shop Vacs don't count)? If so...you need to offer to take over one of these jobs, learn to do it the way your wife wants it done, and do it without complaint, and without expecting reward or recognition. In other words...do it the way she's done it for you. Until now.
- Ask your wife how her day was, and listen to the answer - When you walk in the door, take your wife aside...on the porch, in the living room, in your bedroom...and ask her how her day was. And...big important point...listen to the answer. Don't think about who's playing Buffalo this week, or who's in line for the promotion you're afraid you won't get. Listen, no matter how long it takes. Listen as if you might be quizzed. Listen as if you really cared...because it's your duty, and your PRIVILEGE, to care.
- Sex is not a reward, and not an obligation - if you put your wife into a situation where she feels obligated to physical intimacy as a reward for something you've done, or as something she owes you, you've taken the best gift she can give you out of her hands. That gift is herself.
A lot of men might read this, and ask, "Why should I do any of this? I bring home all, or most of the money...I do the heavy work around the house and yard...I take her to dinner every week..."
All very well and good. But if you go just a little bit further, do these three things, and you'll be acknowledging something important.
Your wife had a choice. She didn't have to...but she chose you. And she validates that choice every day, with every cup of coffee, every piece of clean laundry laid out for you to wear, every kiss.