At the same time, her father, in Indiana, is in his last days
She's hurting.
Why, God? She's such a good person. Her heart is in Your service, and You pull this?
What's happening to me, I don't mind. Cancer, schmantzer, it's just a speed bump in life, and it's fatal, but so what?
"Dying is the day worth living for."
- Captain Hector Barbossa, from "Pirates of the Carribean 3"
But to have pieces of the heart of omeone you love visibly torn away...
None of the pat answers I have for myself seem to fit, and it seems vulgar to even trot them out.
All there is is a question in the dark.
And the sound of falling raindrops, as God weeps with us.
Sometimes I do not understand
the God of love and pain,
who places blessings in the hand,
then takes them back again.
I do not want life's bitter changes
that arrive at the worst of times
brought by a God who re-arranges
life and love for Adam's crimes.
I do not want the aching growth
that is duly forced on me
even though this is His troth
to raise me up, and set me free.
I do not want to say goodbye
for I'm afraid to see God cry.
Music from Switchfoot, with Love Alone is Worth the Fight.
Thanks to Carol Ashby, Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart is back on Kindle, and will be available in paperback soon.
Friends are everything. I couldn't have done it.
Marley, the canine waif from Afghanistan, whom WE helped save, has a Facebook page! Please drop by to see how happy he is today.
Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.
Oh, Andrew, I'm so sorry for all you and Barb are going through. We don't understand why all these things happen. I pray for comfort and strength and for hope and light. Love and hugs to you and Barb!
ReplyDeleteGayl, we don't understand, either...but that's where trust has to come in, though it can be hard.
DeleteThank you so much for the hugs and prayers!
(((((Andrew)))))
ReplyDelete(((((Barbara)))))
(((((Caryn & Robert)))))
Oh, Andrew, sometimes I really don't know how Job could bless God.
I trust that God doesn't make mistakes.
But I'm afraid I don't have the faith of Job.
Annie in Texas
((((((Annie!))))))
DeleteI agree...Job really had to be switched-on in his faith to continue to bless God.
Aww, I'm so sorry! I've discovered in my life that God never wastes my pain. I don't always get to see how he uses it, but I know he never wastes it!
ReplyDeleteAnita, yes...it's never wasted, but His ways are indeed His own.
DeleteThank you so much for being here!
Oh Andrew, it's heartbreaaking when someone you love is in pain. I know - we're going through it with our 21 year old (he's still my baby), recently diagnosed with a serious mental illness with no cure. God and I are having some very frank conversations, mainly consisting of me yelling at Him, "Why don't You BE God and do something?!"
ReplyDeleteIt can be so hard to hold onto the fact that we only have a small view from the back but He has the big picture. We so want to fix it all for them but we can't and God doesn't act as quickly as we want.
Ps 119 has been part of my set Bible readings during this time - I've been reading The Message version and that's been helpful. Plus music like Matthew West, Tauren Wells.
Prayers for you and Barb xx
Liz, our prayers are with you. I'm so sorry...that is one of the hardest situations a person can face.
DeleteI love the way you put it..."Why don't You BE God..?
Ps 119 is our go-to as well.
Thank you so much for your prayers.
Andrew, I am so sorry for all you and Barb are experiencing. May God not only assure you both of His Presence with you but bring others around to surround you as well. Praying this morning for you all.
ReplyDeleteJoanne, thank you so much for being here, and for your prayers.
DeletePraying for you both. God will see you through even all this. Blessings upon blessings!
ReplyDeleteMari-Anna, thank you so much...and you're right, He will see us through.
DeleteBlessings back!
Losing those we love is so hard. Sending hugs and prayers up for all of you especially Barbara!
ReplyDeleteIt sure is, Tara. We're so grateful for your prayers and friendship and love.
DeleteI'll be praying extra hard for both of you. But if we couldn't grieve, we couldn't love.
ReplyDeleteJan, thank you so much! And you're absolutely right; love and grief are inseperable.
Deleteoh, that's a hard one Andrew. It's so easy to manage our own pain, but the pain of those we hold dear. That's much harder.
ReplyDeleteVery true, Annette; one just can't stand to see a loved one hurt!
DeleteSorry you and Barbara are going through so much pain right now. I agree, we often can't understand why God allows these things. Praying that you both know his love and comfort in the midst of it.
ReplyDeleteLesley, thank you so much for your prayers!
DeleteGod's ways aren't ours...and sometimes that is hard.
I will be praying for both of you. It's difficult to understand the "why" but we know the "Who" is walking through all of it with us. Asking for God's comfort for you both.
ReplyDeleteJoan, yes! It's the 'Who' that's important.
DeleteThank you so much for your prayers!
So sad. So hard. So confusing. It's good we don't have to figure it out. Put your hand in the hand of the Man who stilled the waters.... I'll be praying for Barb. Not easy what she's going through.
ReplyDeleteMy dear Norma, that's so true, that it's good we don't have to figure it out. I never looed at it from that angle.
DeleteWe're so grateful for your prayers.
Dear Andrew, such hard trials! I've been a little bit AWOL... But you and Barb are in my heart & prayers.
ReplyDeleteLove, Kathryn
Kathryn, it's wonderful to see you, and we so appreciate your love and prayers!
DeleteSo sorry to hear about these disappointments and difficulties in Barb's life. It truly is hard to watch our loved ones hurting. I'll be lifting her up and you as well. I noticed that this is an older post from last week. I do hope you are doing okay! Prayers are always being lifted for you too, Andrew!
ReplyDeleteBeth, thank you, and we both are very grateful for your prayers.
DeleteIt is so hard to see someone you love hurting. Much worse than experiencing pain oneself.
I'm not doing well at all, but am still trying to stay in the game. Not easy, some days.