Thursday, July 27, 2023

Crying Out To God

 

Kind of funny, but I have a Horseshoe Of Pain running from the metastasis in my right femur, through the pancreas up to my neck, then curving down to the metastasis in my right humerus.

Maybe I should get a tattoo, to follow the path? Let me know in the comments!

But while it's horrible, God's got this, and the healing I have received is being equipped to handle this, every day, hopeful in the face of the hopeless, and cheerful to light the dungeons of despair.

The Lord God will not hear me cry
from the pain and from the deep,
for there's no earthly reason why
I should wait, whimper, and weep,
for I have been amply equipped
with all that a hard man needs
when he's bound and being whipped,
but beyond that are the seeds
of faith and joy, eternal hope
that He secretly slipped in
to my soul to let me cope
with Satan's worst, maybe not to win,
but to stay out on the field,
and play the game, never to yield.

The Five Minute Friday prompt this week is MILESTONE. Dropped one of them on my toe, yeah.

Cancer has milestones so many,
and I refuse to count a one
'cause it's my life and it's my penny,
and counting death-marks just ain't fun.
Sure, I got metastases
and they're getting whole lot worse,
but if I focus mind on these
I will become mine own curse.
I'll adjust to newer pain,
and kowtow to the loss of function.
Even good dudes get the rain,
and I won't ask for an injunction
to stay the sentence passed on me,
the dream hard by Eternity.

Four minutes, a few seconds over. Last couplet was tough.

Music from Cat Stevens, with Another Saturday Night 

Sylvia says, 'I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream!'










19 comments:

  1. I appreciate this truth, Andrew, "Beyond that are the seeds of faith and joy, eternal hope that He secretly slipped into my soul to let me cope." May the Lord continue to give you and Barb strength, grace, and His peace.

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    1. Lisa, I am so glad you found something of value here, and so very grateful for your prayers.

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  2. Andrew, I love that you are able to recognize the seeds of faith, joy, and hope that the Lord sows into your lives in the midst of the pain and struggle. I hope Barbara is feeling better. Praying for the Lord to be with you both.

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    1. Joanne, I really feel blessed beyond measure, and have found a happiness far deeper than I enjoyed in health.

      Barb is better, and we are very appreciative of your prayers.

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  3. I am sorry you are in so much pain Andrew. I am praying for you. I am in a different kind of anguish. I suffer from depression. My husband is a truck driver, so I am alone all day at home every weekday. I do not drive. There are no buses in the country. I am so lonely and I get so depressed. But I cry out to God. I know that he is always with me. My friends and family are too busy to talk to me on the phone. There are days where Jesus is all I have. And Jesus is all I need. It is a real battle. But I think God that he loves me and he gives me the strength to get through each day. Terri #5 FMF

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    1. Terri, thank you for this, and please know that I am praying for you. I can't leave the property any more, not even for a quick trip to McDonalds. It just hurts too much to ride in a vehicle.

      But God is here.

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  4. God surely has give you an abundant supply of courage and tenacity and good humor to face the pain and struggle. I'm sorry there is so much pain and suffering, and I keep on praying for you.

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    1. Kym, the pain will one day pass, but the fun will remain.

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  5. Continuing to pray for you, Andrew, and for Barb. Hope she is feeling better?
    It boggles my mind that despite all your pain you continue to maintain your sense of humor and to encourage all of us not only with the insightful words of your own post, but with the sonnets you add to the comments in ours.

    The sonnet you added to Kate's post cracked me up.

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    1. Grams, that you so much for the affirmation and prayers. Barb is doing better. Not 100% yet, but getting there.

      And I am so glad you enjoy the sonnets! I have fun writing them.

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  6. Well done, Andrew. Fortitude and poetry. Press on. (And put some ice on that toe.) As far as the tattoo goes ... maybe keep the ink on the page. You are already REALLY good at that.

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    1. Kristy, thank you! And I guess I'll pass on the tats. Never had one, anyhow.

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  7. I’m amazed and heartened each week to find a new post from you. I can’t imagine what you are living through, but you must be able to touch God’s face and feel His breath. Bless you as you bless me with your humor and truth.

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    1. I do indeed touch God's face every hour, every day. Yes, it hurts, but the blessings are more than worth it.

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  8. Andrew, I'm glad you are resting in the arms of Jesus because you're right, God has this, for the both of you.
    Bless you, Jennifer

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    1. Jennifer, it did take me awhile to realize that God indeed has this, and I can relax...but that realization is oh so sweet!

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  9. Prayers continue for you my friend! You talk like Paul, He said "I am determined to know nothing but Christ among you." Working on it. Better a milestone land on your toe than a millstone be hung around your neck.

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    1. Mary, wow...first time I have ever been compared to Paul! Thank you so much for this!

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  10. Andrew, I always appreciate your words. I hadn't thought about cancer's milestones, but yeah, I see it now. I'm glad you aren't getting sucked into the message those kinds of milestones can imprint in the thoughts. And, for the record, I vote for no horseshoe-path tattoo. :) I'm continuing to pray for you and Barb, my friend.

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