Don't Go There

 This is not a post I wanted to write.

I want you to remember me as something like Tony Stark, at the finale of Avengers: Endgame

That would not, however, be the truth, and as things continue downhill (new and bigger tumours, making it hard to breathe, among other things...and as for the other things, don't ask), I find my mind going places that are weak and maudlin...

I think, but for the love of Mike,

don’t think on it too long,

what my world might be like

when I am dead and gone.

Will the dogs prick up their ears,

run barking to the door

when they dream that they hear

a voice that comes no more?

Will Barb, on waking, smell the bread

that I once used to bake,

and remembering that I am dead

wish there was some mistake

and though she’s not the sort to cry,

put head in hands, and ask God Why?

I would guess that everyone who's watching death approach thinks this...what will thing be like without me? Will there be an echo of my presence where I once walked?

The answer is, well, of course. As John Donne wrote, Ask not for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee.

Every death's a loss; every death changes things.

So it's a natural path for the mind to follow. It's also (to my mind) the wrong path, because it bespeaks a lack of trust in God, and something of a repudiation of Paul in Phil. 3:13-14

13 - Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,

14 - I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.

In looking forward, I can't look back, and I have to place everything that I will be leaving behind in God's hands. I can't allow the sentimentality, and, yes, the self-pity, to distract from the road ahead, for how I live the coming days is what will truly determine how I am remembered.

And after all, you can't plow a straight furrow while looking over your shoulder.

Look ahead. Don't look back. (And ahead is the Five Minute Friday prompt this week.)

I woul love to hear your thoughts. Am I wrong, here? Am I overlaying an asumption of perection on human nature, the nature that God loves?

Music from Jenn Johnson, with Goodness of God. (Click here if the video doesn't appear.)

I do try to answer each comment in a timely fashion, but with Internet providers really stretched, I have only about half of the access I once did. Please bear with me!

Thanks to Carol Ashby, Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart is back on Kindle, and will be available in paperback soon.

Friends are everything. I couldn't have done it.

Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.