Wednesday, October 30, 2019

Your Dying Spouse 691 - Someone To Watch Over Me

It's a bit embarrassing to admit, but there are times when I wish I could talk to someone about this whole cancer gig, someone who could provide some measure of reassurance.

The hard thing is, through most of my live I have been that person.

So I keep a lid on things, and in public I play the whole mess for laughs.

In private...well, I still play it for laughs.

But I am sure concerned...well, no, scared. The tumours are all around my neck now (did someone just say choke-hold?), and they seem to link to swollen lymph nodes along the chest wall...and to the pancreas.

That is not a happy thought, especially since I've never had a hankering for necklaces.

Especially not the malignant kind.

I wish I knew a guru
or some enlightened soul;
perhaps a talking kangaroo,
or a beatific troll.
I wish that I could sit down
with tea well-laced with rum,
and discuss, without a frown,
what I shall soon become.
I wish that there were answers
that did not inspire dread,
not daily seeing cancer's
wish to make me dead.
You'd think, with all that I've endured
that I'd not need be reassured.

And here is Willie Nelson (yes, really) singing Someone To Watch Over Me.


Thanks to Carol Ashby, Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart is back on Kindle, and will be available in paperback soon.

Friends are everything. I couldn't have done it.

Marley, the canine waif from Afghanistan, whom WE helped save, has a Facebook page! Please drop by to see how happy he is today.


Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.










2 comments:

  1. Oh Andrew, my heart breaks for you,....do not suffer silently. Talk to your wife or a trusted counselor or pastor. It is normal to feel this way! Also, I take Xanax sometimes,...my sister in law, who’s a doctor, says “Chemistry for better living!” It’s knowing when to be strong, and getting a little break from the stress and pain at times. I love you, Andrew, and am so sorry you are going thru this. People with my condition often die from suffocation, and I joke about it sometimes, but at night sometimes I think about it and then I say “God, I know you will be with me. I know you have taken good care of my needs in the past. I will NOT worry about my future.

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    Replies
    1. Diane, thank you so much for this (and please forgive my delayed reply - Blogger doesn't always notify me of comments, or some reason).

      I truly appreciate the wisdom and warmth in your words...and I'll follow your avice.

      Than you for this.

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