Your Dying Spouse 185 - Listening to God

The thing that really sucks about being terminal is that there's a lot more past than future, and it you're screwed up big-time, it feels like there's no way to get out from under the dreck.

And I was there last week. My careers are over, I'm a crap husband (Barbara had to remind me why people even take vacations), and being serious as a heart attack, I tended to scare would-be friends.

To say I don't mix too well with people is kind of an understatement. (Unless they're needing some kinetic attention, and then I mix rather too well.)

We have dogs. A lot of dogs, because we opened the doors to anyone who had no other place to go.

This comes with a cost; Barbara works - hard - and I have limited energy, and it's fading fast. These guys do not get the attention they deserve, and you look at Facebook and stuff, and you think..."I'm not enough. They get food and shelter and each other, but there's not enough me to go around."

I felt like crap. I felt like I was failing them.

And last Friday (this is Sunday night) a little Belgian Shepherd pup turned up, and insisted on coming into the house. I hadn't seen him around the area, and so said, "Sure...come on in!". Thought, well, one more. Bring it. A dog out on his own lasts less than 24 hours here.

He stayed the day, and that afternoon his parents, having just gotten home from work and finding their dog missing, were driving round the neighbourhood, slowly. I flagged them down, having a gut-feel for what they were looking for.

And so Rex went home, much to the dismay of everyone here. In a few hours he made himself more popular than a snowcone vendor in an Arizona summer. He's got a warm, winning, and just plain FUN personality.

This morning...guess who showed up?

Yep. Rex. He wanted to be here. With the minimal attention that I can now give, with the heat in the house (this is July New Mexico, and we can't afford AC, with all that...he wanted to be here.

He jumped into my arms. And didn't let go until I took him inside to meet his friends.

Yes, his folks came and got him, but he'll be back. They don't mind; they know he's happy.

Everyone's happy.

And I am not quite the failure I thought.

Marley update...he's received a lot of support, but STILL NEEDS HELP TO BE SAVED.

WE ARE MAKING A DIFFERENCE!

If you have a mment, I'd like to ask you to visit Change.org to consider a petition to free a 'death row dog' who has been separated from his family for ten months over a misunderstanding. Marley was saved from Afghanistan by a US serviceman; please help make sure this story doesn't end in needless tragedy! Marley's gotten a lot of support...but he still needs our help.

If you can, please do leave a comment. I am trying to answer all, and I am failing, but please know this - I read and treasure each one.

Below are my recent releases on Kindle -please excuse their presence in the body of the blog. I haven't the energy to get them up as 'buttons' in the sidebar. You can click on the covers to go to the Amazon links.