tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post1449314954102913382..comments2024-03-28T11:09:46.338-07:00Comments on Blessed Are The Pure Of Heart: Your Dying Spouse 36 - Caregiver LimitationsAndrewhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13230537202427640540noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-65317256858348882872015-07-30T20:54:57.497-07:002015-07-30T20:54:57.497-07:00Oh, Dawn, you're in my prayers, right now. I a...Oh, Dawn, you're in my prayers, right now. I am so sorry about your uncle.<br /><br />Your love and intentionality show in your words; I'm sure that he's blessed by your presence, your thoughts, your love.<br /><br />Thank you so much for being here today.Andrewhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13230537202427640540noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-25944203980241281522015-07-30T20:53:35.601-07:002015-07-30T20:53:35.601-07:00Barbara, a hug, and perhaps your tears, are the be...Barbara, a hug, and perhaps your tears, are the best presence you can provide.<br /><br />It's my privilege to be here, to be able to share this trip, to let y'alll know that love and joy and something of a future can STILL bloom...even now.<br /><br />I'll admit that physical hugs hurt now; I can only get an A-frame hug from my wife. But cyber-hugs are much appreciated!<br /><br />As are prayers.Andrewhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13230537202427640540noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-52225779632869718692015-07-30T20:50:57.517-07:002015-07-30T20:50:57.517-07:00There was a song, from the Fifties, as I recall......There was a song, from the Fifties, as I recall..."Little Things Mean A Lot". That's so true, because they're obviously done for their own sake, while grand gestures are almost always tinged with the possibility of an ulterior motive, even if that motive's just as an ego-prop for the giver.<br /><br />And yes, just being there...that is so important, because this is one of the loneliest places there is.<br /><br />Thank you so much for being here, Beth.Andrewhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13230537202427640540noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-67037435287884727112015-07-30T05:27:20.518-07:002015-07-30T05:27:20.518-07:00This is a precious gift to me today. Watching my u...This is a precious gift to me today. Watching my uncle deteriorate quickly leaves me wondering the best way to bless him and my family. Listening was one of the easiest (and hardest) ways to invest in those I love while I can...just being present. <br /><br />Praying for you today and thank you for sharing!<br />Blessings,<br />DawnAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089167501291169373noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-53456091063018042872015-07-30T05:25:36.872-07:002015-07-30T05:25:36.872-07:00This is a precious gift to me today. Watching my u...This is a precious gift to me today. Watching my uncle deteriorate quickly leaves me wondering the best way to bless him and my family. Listening was one of the easiest (and hardest) ways to invest in those I love while I can...just being present. <br /><br />Praying for you today and thank you for sharing!<br />Blessings,<br />DawnAnonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16089167501291169373noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-28764034098795564862015-07-29T13:43:39.905-07:002015-07-29T13:43:39.905-07:00Andrew, I have gained such insight from you readin...Andrew, I have gained such insight from you reading your heart; reading your "advice" - if you will - for those of us who may be in your shoes, or in Barbara's shoes. I have always had a problem with know exactly what to say to a person who, for instance, has just been diagnosed with cancer; has just lost a loved one...etc. etc. Sometimes, depending on the person, I just hug them tightly and let them know they are in my thoughts and prayers.<br /><br />Your words shared with us all impact what we can do or say; and coming from one who is "in your shoes", it makes it all that more important to know and remember.<br /><br />Thank you for sharing your heart and soul...hugs may not be appropriate for one who is in pain; however, consider yourself (and Barbara) cyber-hugged!! And prayers continue...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16954512718777249848noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-23530854446423225852015-07-29T06:49:37.751-07:002015-07-29T06:49:37.751-07:00Such simple gifts that we can give and they mean s...Such simple gifts that we can give and they mean so much to a dying spouse, Andrew. Somehow, as humans, we think we must do more and find far grander, and more profound ways of showing our love, when it's really just being with our dying loved one that makes the biggest impact. And these small and meaningful gifts you've mentioned are the most treasured across the board--not just with a dying spouse. Thanks for sharing your heart once again, my friend!Bethhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13156048755652103073noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-1033885647449003832015-07-28T19:53:50.773-07:002015-07-28T19:53:50.773-07:00It's enough, but only up to a point. Encourage...It's enough, but only up to a point. Encouragement of an existing or latent interest is also vital, and sometimes the caregiver has to lend heart-and-muscle power.<br /><br />And the ill person has to be willing to accept it. A condition of 'asking for help' should NOT be set, because then it becomes a pride battle. Just a simple, "Hey, I see you're working on XXX...is there something I could help you with, like, say, YYY?" is what's needed.<br /><br />Really needed, in many cases, because it's easy to forget that even being close to death, a person still wants to contribute something, still wants to feel a part of the dance. They just need a hand.Andrewhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13230537202427640540noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4095822388315899381.post-2307666331678266642015-07-28T19:36:27.044-07:002015-07-28T19:36:27.044-07:00We can knock ourselves senseless trying, but we re...We can knock ourselves senseless trying, but we really don't have the power to keep another soul's spirits up, do we Andrew.<br /><br />Admitting this is true frees the try-er up to simply love, simply listen, simply be present.<br /><br />And maybe that's enough?Linda Stollhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15568264417855502332noreply@blogger.com